Fist Bump to the Eastland Parents

During times of self doubt, I sometimes question if I am more a glorified baby sitter than a parent. What I mean is that I provide all of their basic needs (food, clothing, shelter...), I play with them, give them loads of affection, watch out for their safety, and try to mold them into well adjusted people. Of course it's easy to love them: they are adorable, funny, smart, creative, and most importantly they return love unconditionally. Honestly, though, it doesn't take a parent to provide these things; any care taker can perform these tasks with love and compassion.

On occasion, however, certain events take place that really validate my role as a parent. For instance when Jack was having an allergic reaction to eggs and therefore was up all night throwing up I was actually able to focus more on him than the mess...this was a huge feat for me because I am SO squeamish when it comes to those kind of messes. I had another incidence occur this morning, when after I made my eggs and was just about to take a bite, Jack told me that he had to go use the potty. Seeing his bow legged/tippy toe walk, I realized that he had already gone. Ohmygosh!, and without going into too many details (and honestly, who wants to immortalize these kind of things), it was a disaster! Jack was pretty calm, and just kept saying, "Gracious! It's a lot of poopies!", and I stayed really calm and never became frustrated or disappointed that he made a mistake. I kind of just acted without thinking: urgently taking care of him first then the bathroom, and the whole time keeping Bailey out of the way because she really wanted to help clean up (yuck!).

A couple of minutes later, after I washed my hands, I ate my breakfast, and it dawned on me that I am truly a parent when I can clean up the toxic waste in the bathroom without hesitation, and Jack went on to play like everything was ok. I was really proud of myself for not loosing my cool (something I am very capable of doing), and not making a frustrating and gross situation worse, or traumatic for Jack. I know that during all the times of babysitting (and I was the babysitting queen in high school), if I had been presented with this same situation I would have panicked, called the parents, and left the kids naked in the tub until his or her mom or dad came home. (Ok, I hope it wouldn't have been that bad, but I know I would have panicked, and probably shed a few tears!)

I am reading the book called Cesar's Way which is sort of a dog training book by the "Dog Whisperer, Cesar Millan (he has a show on National Geographic, and his motto is that he rehabilitates dogs and trains humans). It's kind of a Tuesdays with Morrie for dogs and their humans. The main lesson I am getting from this book is that to love your dog is a two way street. Just giving them a ton of affection (and feeding them), though it may fulfil your needs as a human, will not fulfill of your dog's needs. To have a true connection with your pet and really to show true love is to respect the needs first of your dog, which is basically letting them be dogs rather than small furry children. I feel like even though this book was meant to help people have better relationships with their pets, I think it can help people understand how to have better relationships with humans, too. I think there are a lot of lessons in this book that can help us be better parents, spouses, and friends.

Rich sent out this email which I think is absolutely hilarious, but it also proves that he is also truly a parent, and I am so proud of how he handled this situation (and kind of glad I wasn't there!).

"Date: Monday, August 25, 2008, 6:27 PM

So here's a quick update on my household and the chaos that is potty-training Jack. First of all, Jack is awesome. He doesn't love sitting in the "potty-chair", however he has very few accidents so we are optimistic that the training is moving in the right direction. On Sunday, we had a minor setback. My dad and I took him fishing for the first time, and he loved it. The trip went great and I believe that Bridget will update the blog with the details. http://snackersandsnookums.blogspot.com. After the fishing trip we took Jack to Burger King for a snack and so he could play in their kids area. In case you don't know, Burger King has an elaborate plastic kids area with tunnels and slides, which is all indoors (a nice change from the outdoor play equipment from my era. No longer is the slide super hot from the sun, or dripping wet from the rain.) Anyway, at some point Jack crawled up to the second level of the play area. He was having a grand time when his expression suddenly changed, and he yelled, "Daddy help". Now a little background on Jack: he has been stuck in a play area once before back when Bridget was 9 months pregnant with Paige, resulting in me leaving work early to drive across town to crawl through a smelly, plastic, claustrophobic maze. The entire time, other people's children are crawling over me. So when Jack cried out at Burger King, I mistook his alarm as panic for being trapped once again. Only this time before I entered the play area, a little puddle formed around his feet. OK, so I grabbed a handful of napkins and put on my best "Indiana Jones expression" and ventured into the labyrinth. I quickly discovered that it is near impossible for adults to maneuver through this network of plastic, and I found myself wondering how the hell they clean in here. The smell of BO seemed to radiate from the plastic; I guess that after thousands of kids running, climbing, and sweating in a closed environment this would occur. I too started to sweat, and after negotiating a plastic slide with rubber grips that serves as both a slide and ladder, I made it to the second level. I got to Jack and started to mop up the puddle around his feet when a new horror arose. Apparently, Jack had more than urine in his underwear. And to make the situation even more critical, two kids had just arrived and were crawling all over the plastic tunneling. I quickly forced Jack down the slide/ ladder to my dad who was waiting at the bottom. This was not a pretty undertaking, and I will spare you the details. Let's just say that several more napkins had to be handed to me so I could clear a way out. Once free of the play area, I informed the Burger King staff that my son had an accident and that they might want to call a HAZ-MAT unit. They told me that they would close off the play area until it could be cleaned. I thought a better solution would be to burn down the entire restaurant just to be sure, but the manager assured me that this type of thing happens from time to time. I then spent the next 15 minutes washing Jack's shorts in the sink with hand soap to return them to a color resembling khaki. My dad, the saint that he is, spent his time getting Jack cleaned off. We then rushed Jack home to give him a proper bath and me a proper drink. I think Jack escaped the whole situation without any long term emotional scaring. As for me, I found myself thinking that every father has his own battle stories and what doesn't kill you only makes you stronger. This is why I drink.

Rich"

Way to go Us! Hopefully Rich won't be suffering from PTSD because of this horror, but he seems to be coping well almost a week later (the drinking he mentioned was really non-existent).

Adventures in Potty Training

It's time to get serious! I'm so over Jack being in diapers, but now he seems to be enjoying them more than ever. Uggh, so like a guy...our timing is just off. Last month, he was acting ready but I had a lot going on, now that I am ready, he has found new distractions that won't allow him to take a break. Last week, since it was so nice, I brought the potty chair outside, and gave him a bunch of sugar-free cool aid (hence the red mustache). He did go three times for me in his chair (but he also had three accidents). I felt like it was some real progress.

I'm not sure if he is taunting her or playing with her, but luckily Paige doesn't understand the difference yet. She is just happy for any attention from her big brother. When I was sorting laundry, Jack took away a toy that Paige was playing with, so I told him that he needed to give her another toy...so he gave her some dirty laundry. There are going to be a lot of undies pictures. I'm confident that Jack will treasure these photos when he gets older. When we first started this endeavor, I really didn't see the point in messing in both underwear and pants (or jammies as Jack calls all clothes) since we were having accidents almost every hour or two after the first day. Hey, if we aren't going to wear pants, why bother with a shirt, either? We've been using a timer to let him know when he needs to try to go potty, and usually nothing happens. One time after a fruitless attempt, he got up from the chair and said, "whah whah whah" (the sound that happens in movies when a goof up has been made.) Whatever helps him deal with the frustration. He also told me when the timer had gone off, that he was "Baby Jack" meaning that he was still a baby and didn't need to use the potty.
Just a little break from the potty. Jack has started calling our neighbor Jamie, Mommy. I think because he calls me Mama, and her girls call her Mommy, he just figured that was her name. When we were at play group, he wanted me to push him on the swings, but I couldn't because I was feeding Paige. Another mom, Anna, offered to push him, but he said he wanted Mommy and grabbed Jamie's hand. How could she say no to that? Pretty darn charming.

I guess I am not the only one who is really wanting the fireplace finished. Well, the fireplace is finished, but the mantle is still in progress. Just like his mama, he gets frustrated with a slow paced project and takes over. (A little note, he is wearing a diaper here, so I must have been getting frustrated with cleaning up all the messes.)

Looks like Paige is going to try out the hammer, too.

Silly girl, chewing on the mallet will not get that mantle finished!

Mantle? Who cares about the mantle, this toy is great, not only is it good for chewing, but it makes a ton of noise!

Can dress her up, but she is still going to chew on a toy car.

Jack really wanted to show off his Happy Meal toy. He has been so funny lately: one morning Jack took a toy away from Paige and I told him that he needed to give it back, but he wouldn't. Rich intervened and had to put him in time out because Jack just couldn't get it together. The whole time while Jack was crying, he was yelling, "Bye-Bye, Daddy! Time to go to work!"

As of last week, Paige has decided that she is going to pull herself up to her feet. She hasn't really started to cruise, in fact she doesn't really know what to do with herself once she gets up. She starts to cry a little and her little legs shake, and finally she plops town on her tush. What a relief. She also does it in the tub, which is against the rules, so I have to tell her no, which she understands, but doesn't like. Probably because she has always heard this term, she knows exactly what it means, but when it is directed at her, she gets her feelings hurt and starts to cry. Breaks the heart, almost enough to let her stand in the tub or chew on the cords after all.

Now What?

Believe it or not, Rich did not pick these gloves out himself. The only reason he is letting me include this picture is because he wants some proof that he helps out once in a while. (The only reason he helps out, though, is to wear the pretty pink gloves!)

This one seems interested, lets just skip Jack and get started on Paige!

I think yesterday was our "breakthrough" when after accident upon accident, I put him in a "pull-up" and took him to Target to buy potty beans aka M&Ms, thinking maybe he needs a really special bribe and raisins just aren't motivating him enough. Sure enough, we get home, he pulls down his pants and pee pees in the potty!!! So he got his two M&Ms. Shortly later, he really wanted more so I told him he had to pee pee again in the potty, and he tried so hard that he actually pooed a little. Today was such a success, too! When we left the house this morning to meet some friends for a play date, I put a pull-up on him because I just didn't want to deal with public restrooms. I expected him to wet in it because he hadn't gone all morning, but when we got home he ran to the potty and went, and sure enough, the pull up was dry! We didn't have a single accident all day. I am so proud. I do know that just because we had a good day today, that we have a long way to go, but I'm just going to relish today for a little while longer. God bless M&Ms!

Play Time, Bed Time, and Everything in Between

Ladies in the bed already?

After these two munchkins were found in bed together, I thought maybe they needed a break from each other...so I took the kids to visit my Mom, Steve, and Deni in Lafayette. Ok, I wasn't really worried about where Jack's hands were (hey where are they, though?), but I did want to take the kids to visit their grandparents and Denise before their auntie had to start school. Before we we went, we hosted play group, and we had a full and rambunctious house, but I have to note that Jack was a terrific host: he shared without complaint, he didn't throw any tantrums, and he even ate most of his lunch. Maybe I am doing something right!

Rich thinks Jack is too old for bath pictures, so this may be his last one.

Just a delicate flower!Just getting ready to clean houseDoesn't Jack look lovely in my headband? Such style!

When we got to the grandparents' house, we realized that we forgot an extra pack-n-play, so Ceana's crate was the only place we could put Jack for naps and bedtime. Yeah, I'm totally making things up. He actually slept in their guest bed and didn't have any issues. He is really adjusting well to being in a big boy bed. As for this picture, the dog crate really is one of Jack's favorite places to play when goes to their house, and luckily Ceana is a generous little dog who doesn't mind sharing with this half feral little boy (especially since he is contained), confusing as it may be for her.

A rare moment of sitting still (and doesn't he look happy about it!) Jack frames up nicelyPaige and GrandpaPaige and Auntie

These next photos were taken at a children's museum call W.O.W. (World of Wonder). He really loved playing with this train set, and it was so funny because a little boy who was about a year younger was an absolute disaster while playing with the trains. I just remember Jack being the same way and feeling the same frustrations as that mother did. I was really proud of Jack for sharing the train so well and not feeding off of the other kid's tantrums. It's too bad that it took another kid having problems to make me appreciate where Jack is right now, but then again I will be going through it all over again when Paige hits that stage in a year. Joy.These next couple of pictures demonstrate just how mobile and active Paigie is right now. She CANNOT be contained! It seems like after only a week of crawling, she has decided that she has mastered that feat, and now she is going to try to start walking...or maybe she just doesn't like crawling on her knees so she trying to use her feet instead. All I know is that she is fast, and she is getting on Jack's last nerve. Oh, and nothing is safe on our coffee table anymore...one of our magazines became Paige fodder. (Just a little extra fiber)Don't let this next photo fool you, Denise isn't having that much fun here, but thank goodness for iPods...can always have a favorite movie on hand. W.O.W. used to be one of her favorite places to go, but you'd never guess that now.Jack enjoyed the next room since it had a piano that he was actually allowed to bang on 'til his heart's content, and no one told him to take it easy on the drums. I think it may be a little early to decide if he is prodigy material yet.

His favorite part of the museum was the pirate ship. Arrrr Matey!

Land Ho!

Grandpa, Paige, and Me

We also went to the park, and as can be seen, Paige's favorite part was chewing on her hat. Ah, the simple things.

Just peekingI had to use my ninja skills to catch Deni having fun

Before we left town, we made sure to have lunch with my bestest friend, AnaLisa, and her darling boyfriend, David. Doesn't she look so natural holding a baby? I can't help to notice that David is very comfortable as well. Hmmm.

Before I post, I just want to give a shout out to Rich's Uncle Jerry who just had emergency gall bladder surgery yesterday. The last I heard everything went really well, and he was expected to recover just fine. We love you and you are in our prayers!

Big Boy Bed and Other Matters

It's here, the BIG blue race car is here! I'm really happy with how it looks in Jack's room (although I didn't realize how small his room really is), but even more than that, Jack LOVES LOVES LOVES it!! Not only does it work as a bed, but also a slide: he loves to slide down the front end of it. So far so good about staying in his bed...in fact I don't think it has even occurred to him that he can leave it until I enter his room. I don't think I will be drawing too much attention to the fact that it is possible for him to do this.

Bye-Bye Crib!Male Bonding (Rich, Grandpa Hank, and Jack)

Jack can helpOnce assembled, Jack said of his new bed, "whoa, this is a big crib!"

After nap time, which only lasted an hour (I'll take it), we drove up to Sarah and Jeremey's house to celebrate her 30th birthday. Most of the people there were friends from college, so it was a little reunion. It's funny seeing the people that we used to party with and do really dumb things together, become parents and have to assume the roles of responsible parenting... and we wonder why the younger generations of kids are having such problems. Actually (and unfortunately, I missed getting a picture), at one point, some of our friends noticed that Jack was standing alone, fully dressed, in the kiddie pool-downing his juice. I think it was Allan, who speculated that Jack was going to be a lot of fun in college!

The Birthday Girl

I made this for Sarah...a moment of non-momness for me"Little Hamburgers"

Lay of the 'roids, Allan!

Ok, I had a little fun with some editing features. As "ripped" as Allan is, he's not quite this big. (Because of Jared's angle the only thing I could accentuate of his was his tummy and tush...as funny as it was to see, I don't think it's worth losing a friendship.) I told Michelle and Allan that I was going to pixelate their daughter, Eleanor's naughty bits, but it wasn't as funny as the little burgers.

Evening's End

After we got home, put the kids to bed (no issues with Jack), we looked over all the pictures we took (see slide show below), and noticed that neither one of us were in any of them. Good thing for self portraits!